Wow!!!

Folks I am completely speechless. I thought I had heard it all - from a guy who believes that the government blew up the WTC towers to Congress calling french fries french fries, from having a 16oz bottle of shampoo cost only 3 dollars more than an 8 oz one to reading a story about kids who charged 13 cents for one bunch of bananas and 27 cents for two bunches.

But I was wrong

Thats right, I realized tonight that there are still depths of the human psyche that I do not understand and have not fathomed because tonight I read about the
(drumroll please)

HAMDOG!!!!

Thats right America - forget about your heart attack inducing Monster Burgers, or gigantic plates of cheese fries, gargantuan ("you know - I've always loved that word, gargantuan, and I so rarely get a chance to use it in a sentence") slices of apple pie topped with melting scoops of ice cream, don't even consider the messy fingers of homemade ribs or the fat content of that succulent steak on your plate. Put away from you your Twinkies, HoHo cakes, Nutty Bars, chocolate chip cookies, Oreos, Cheez-it (both regular and White Cheddar) and please, please, please don't talk to me about candy bars. None of these delectable things live up to the sheer, unmitigatedly unadulterated genius of the Hamdog (I wanted to see what two words that start with un- look like side-by-side, now I know).

Now for all of you wanting to know what a Hamdog is --- I'll tell you.

First you take a hot dog
Then you wrap it in a beef patty
Then you deep fry it
Then you put it into a hoagie bun
Then you cover it with chili
Then you cover that with cheese
Then you put the onions on it
(hopefully you've already put it onto a plate)
Because we have only barely reached artery-clogging status in our morbidly obese nation we then put a fried egg on top of everything else
And then we put two (2!!!) FISTFULLS of fries (french not freedom).

Ladies and Gentleman - everyone's next favorite fast food burger!!!!
(can you even possibly imagine BK doing a commercial on this - or even Golden Arches with its new yuppie, health food kick? This is unreal . . . the comedic possibilities are virtually endless . . . I need to stop)

Note: I did not make this up, this burger(?) is actually sold at Mulligans Pub in Atlanta (no I didn't go there nor did any of my friends - the story was found on cbsnews.com, so there).

11 x 5 = 55 (its 11:55 right now)

I haven't a clue

As I ponder’d in silence,
Returning upon my poems, considering, lingering long,
A Phantom arose before me, with distrustful aspect,
Terrible in beauty, age, and power,
The genius of poets of old lands,
As to me directing like flame its eyes,
With finger pointing to many immortal songs,
And menacing voice, What singest thou? it said;
Know’st thou not, there is but one theme for ever-enduring bards?
And that is the theme of War, the fortune of battles,
The making of perfect soldiers?

Be it so, then I answer’d,
I too, haughty Shade, also sing war—and a longer and greater one than any,
Waged in my book with varying fortune—with flight, advance, and retreat—Victory deferr’d and wavering,
(Yet, methinks, certain, or as good as certain, at the last,)—The field the world;
For life and death—for the Body, and for the eternal Soul,
Lo! too am come, chanting the chant of battles,
I, above all, promote brave soldiers.

I feel constrained to give out thoughts and great, ponderous pronouncements on how amazing that God could use me and to tell everyone how much I enjoyed the work that God did in my life this summer. And then I realize that I'm no better than Whitman doing my own promoting of my accomplishments and trying to make people to see how much I gave for this summer.

But in the end I am tongue-tied.

My mouth is as empty as my brain is full.

And I am remanded into silence.

To God be the Glory

From me to you

Aaaahhhhhh
Members of the the world - Thank you for joining me in this quest that is called life. I have no idea if what will happen will be good or bad. I only know that it will be interesting.

I have absolutely no idea why I wrote that last paragraph. I don't even think it means anything. So - Ironwood was absolutely incredible in every possible way. God was so good to me in allowing me to be there and be a small part in Gods plan for the summer. It is good to be back but I do miss the friends and family that I left in Cali. Anyway may the blessings of the Sasquatch continue to uphold you and exalt you.

Peace brethren